First stages of an injury …
I was told it would be a good idea to document my recovery time from my injury. Everything about it. So here it is in real time – all the raw emotions, what my days look like, doctors, PT, everything.
First, let me tell you what happened …. End of January, I was bouldering with my boyfriend, dad, sister and her husband and was having a great day crushing some routes I normally can’t do. It was my last climb of the day, I missed the grip and ended up falling about 9 feet directly down and landed completely wrong.
To urgent care we went immediately. After an “oh no” from the doctor, X-rays showed that I ended up having multiple fractures in my fibula. And the suggestion that I go to an orthopedic surgeon ASAP. (Pictures is the X-rays are below)
Orthopedic appointment. Two days later. Doctor comes in and immediately starts telling me what surgery I need to have and that they can get me in the following afternoon. I sat there stunned. I didn’t even know what was wrong with my foot/ leg not to mention being able to grasp the idea that I had to have surgery. Immediate tears. Luckily my boyfriend slowed the doctor down and said that we were going to get a second opinion.
The next day, a second opinion. This doctor was great. He calmly explained exactly what the injury was – basically when I fell I dislocated my tibia & fibula which resulted in fracturing my fibula, injuring the deltoid ligament in my ankle and possibly injuring another ligament. He drew out the injury on a white board and showed us the X-rays. Surgery was necessary to fix everything. Even though I had already been told I needed surgery it didn’t help hearing it again but I was able to hold back the tears. Hearing you need surgery is like getting punched in the gut. Your brain tries to process the information but everything becomes really cloudy and anxiety starts to set in. And before I knew it, surgery was getting scheduled for the following week and a hard cast was being put on my leg to help protect the injury.
Day #4: all the emotions … lots of tears, stress, anxiety and I feel like I was living in a nightmare that I couldn’t wake up from. Multiple doctors appointments, lots of different surgery remedies to fix my ankle/leg. It was very confusing and stressful trying to keep everything straight and to pick a doctor and go with their surgery. Everyone had a different opinion. I went from a hard splint to a boot back to a splint and finally to a hard cast. and let me tell you, a splint was the easiest piece of hardware to manage.
And then there was the stress of being out of work. I am a teacher. It’s not easy to know that you’re going to be out of work for six weeks in the middle of the school year and have to leave your lesson planning, teaching, grading… everything up to it a substitute. Because when you take a medical leave of absence, it’s like you don’t even exist anymore. You have to put an out of office memo on your email. You’re not allowed to respond to emails. You can’t grade you, can’t lesson plan, you can’t do anything. It was a complete roller coaster of emotions.
Day #5: Had a hard time sleeping again last night. But, today hasn’t been so bad. Not a lot of pain in the ankle. I am always the most sore in the morning. Moving around is still exhausting using only one leg and the cast seems very heavy. And my leg keeps going numb and falling asleep even though I’m constantly wiggling my toes. It’s very frustrating not being able to get your own food, get a drink, to pick up anything that you see laying around the house and having to rely completely on someone else. It makes me feel super guilty and helpless. I didn’t have the attention span to watch TV or read my book today. So I tried coloring and that kept me occupied for a little while. Appetite has been good so far granted it’s only 2 o’clock in the afternoon. So we shall see how the rest of the day goes.
Afternoon started off awesome! Received a card in the mail from a friend and inside was a massive list of things I can do that do require walking. Finally tears of happiness and a smile. What a change. Then, Dad showed up and brought the puppy dog. We watched an episode of Bones on television just like we used to do when I was growing up. It was really nice to do something completely normal and it took my mind off of everything.
Day #6: Today is not been a good day. I woke up in a lot of pain. To the point where it’s almost been completely unbearable and I can’t find a position that I’m comfortable in without bringing me to tears. My leg is very achy and my ankle is killing me. And the cast just seems exceptionally heavy today. My spirits and mood are also not in a good spot either. I am feeling very sorry for myself, very unmotivated, very jealous that my boyfriend is running a race right now which has led to a lot of tears this morning already and it’s only 9:27 in the morning. I am so jealous. So here I am sitting on the couch with a bag of goldfish and luckily my two nurses a.k.a. my kittens who know mom needs some extra love today. This is going to be a long recovery time.
I’m still on the couch… like every. minute. of. the. day.
Day #7: Feeling grateful! I would be lost without my boyfriend. He has been so patient, doting and helpful. I feel guilty asking him to get me a drink or help me put some pants on…. but he does it right away without a complaint and always gives me a kiss. He has been countless hours over the past couple days reading different articles about foods to eat to heal broken bones, meal plans to make sure I stay healthy and speed up recovery, do’s and don’ts after surgery. I would be totally lost without him.
Tried to keep my spirits up today by creating a To Do list of things to get accomplished during this time of recovery. Silly simple things like finish my book, plan our next vacation, in every state find something to visit, maybe take a graduate class… what would you put on your list?
Day #8: Surgery is today. Nerves and anxiety is out of control. My stomach is very uneasy, I am emotional and snapping at everything. Please let this be over….
Hang tight for part 2…. recovery after surgery…
Pictures below of X-rays
one more mile 